Forgiveness

Getting God's forgiveness is simple ..

If we confess. .. He is sure and Just and shall forgive. 1 John 1:9 (ESV)

So stop whipping yourself emotionally it won't make you right before God 1 grams worth. 

Nor will it right the wrong. ..

Accept there's absolutely nothing to do or to be done by you to obtain that forgiveness, God knows that. Just confess ie acknowledge openly before God you did wrong and He 'God' is right ask him to forgive.

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Accept it.

Brush the dust off you're feet and sin no more...